


The Bet

by theangelsace



Category: Good Omens
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-03
Updated: 2015-03-03
Packaged: 2018-03-16 04:22:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3474269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theangelsace/pseuds/theangelsace
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which, the Angel Aziraphale and the Demon Crowley, are in fact a couple but neither Heaven nor Hell can tell the difference.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Bet

**Author's Note:**

> Happy 21st Birthday Jen

Springtime in London was much the same as anywhere in England, the weather was changing – often multiple times in the same hour and most people were unsure if they made the right choice in leaving their umbrellas at home. For most, this had been an unwise decision. Unless of course you were an Angel, or indeed a demon and were able to instantly dry your clothes with a thought. It was something; Aziraphale found himself doing for the second time that day, having forgotten to pick up some more sugar during his earlier trip to the shops.

“I thought you had gone home, dear?” Aziraphale said slightly confused, entering the main area of the book shop , it having been rebuilt after the apocalypse that never was. Aziraphale had spent hours explaining to Adam, all the precise details of the book shop, right down to where each speck of dust was placed. On the third day, Crowley made a sailor blush, showed a few pictures of the shop to the anti-Christ, and the place was as good as it was before.

“Not happy to see me, Angel?” Crowley asked, producing a glass of wine for them each, rather than choosing some from the selection Aziraphale had in the other room; partly because he didn’t fully trust Aziraphale’s wine selection, but mostly because he was just lazy.

“Of course, dear, just a little surprised is all” Aziraphale replied, taking the proffered drink “I thought all business for the month had been discussed”

“It has” Crowley confirmed “However, I currently have no desire to go home only to be yelled at through the television, or the radio, or in the case of that one instance the microwave” he listed. Though it was rather difficult to take being yelled at seriously, by even Beelzebub himself, when every other word was interrupted with a ping 

“Have you done something wrong” Aziraphale asked

“Other than not turning enough people over to the dark side and falling in love with the enemy you mean?” Crowley responded “Not really, no. Besides, despite it being the twenty-first century your place still leaves a lot to be desired on the technology front”

“Yes, I myself have found myself in the same situation, dear" Aziraphale replied, "I have a laptop now you know and a mobile phone” he added, somewhat proudly, taking the opportunity to kiss the surprised Demon. Despite both inventions having been commonplace for over a decade, the Angel had still insisted on making do with a landline.

“Really?” asked Crowley, genuinely confused by this latest bit of news “I thought your lot were forever stuck in 1957, as evidenced by the uniform” he finished, gesturing to the outfit Aziraphale was wearing

“I happened to pick these out myself”

“I know, that’s what I’m afraid of” Crowley replied “Anyway back to the point, heaven, and technology?”

“Oh yes” Aziraphale said “Seems they have the hang of electronic communication now. Apparently, your lot got fed up of having to use landlines all the time so they taught them how to use emails, and now they’re obsessed with the thing” the Angel explained

“Interesting” Crowley hissed “though I suppose it was only a matter of time, and it certainly sounds like something we’d do; anything to make our live easier. Even if it means setting up Wi-Fi for heaven”

“Indeed” Aziraphale agreed, placing the now nearly empty glass on the end table. “I just can’t help but think there’s more to it than convenience’s sake”

“Knowing our lots, you may have a point”

***********************************************

To: sevencirclesof@hell.com  
Subject: The Bet

As you are aware it has been a year since the agreed terms of the bet as to when Aziraphale and Crowley will finally admit theirs is more than a professional relationship. However, there seems to be no clear sign of this.

We suggest therefore, an extension and a renegotiation of the terms

  
Your Ever Forgiving Upstairs Neighbours,  
Heaven  
Tuesday March 3rd  
13:12

\--

To: kingdomcome@heaven.co.uk  
Subject: The Bet

We have reason to suspect that Aziraphale and Crowley are a lot better at hiding things from us than first thought. Therefore, we accept the extension and renegotiating of terms.

Please, email us the details. This will then be passed on to the appropriate department and all bureaucratic standards adhered to.

Your Immortal Enemies,

Hell

Tuesday 3rd March  
13:28

\---

To: sevencirclesof@hell.com

Subject: The Bet

We ourselves have had similar suspicions.

Therefore, we suggest getting a little more involved in things this time. And so long as no gets hurt, pretty much anything is OK.

Your Ever Forgiving Upstairs Neighbours  
Heaven  
Tuesday 3rd March  
13:42

\--

To: kingdomcome@heaven.co.uk  
Subject: The Bet

We are a bad influence on you, marvelous.

Your Immortal Enemies  
Hell  
Tuesday 3rd March  
14:02

********

The real trouble with determining whether or Aziraphale and Crowley were really a couple was the fact that they had always acted as if though they were . After all, the two of them did most things expected of a couple, spending time together, going for walks. And nobody was entirely sure when either of them had gotten over calling the other ‘dear’ or ‘angel’, the best guess is that this occurred sometime during the Plague.

The fact therefore, that Crowley had just invited Aziraphale to dinner in one of London’s Michelin Star restaurants did not register on either Heaven or Hell’s radars.

******

“Really, what was wrong with the clothes I picked” Aziraphale asked, trying to get used to the suit Crowley insisted he wear.

“Usually; too old fashioned” Crowley replied “Today, though that sweater vest of yours would mean we wouldn’t even be allowed through the front doors. Now, come on our reservation is for eight”

“This tie doesn’t feel right” Aziraphale complained, moving it out of place

“You get used to it, Angel” Crowley replied, fixing the tie before quickly kissing Aziraphale. “Now, I’ve left the Bentley out there long enough”.

“Very well, let’s go” Aziraphale said, locking up with the click of his fingers.

As usual, the car journey was accompanied by songs from the Queen: Greatest Hits Album. However, unusually this time Crowley did not break any motoring laws ; although, the roads were oddly quiet for the West End. When they arrived, it was with a great deal of reluctance that Crowley gave the keys over to the valet parking attendant. Not that Crowley ever had any use for them himself; he just didn’t like the thought of someone else driving his car.

“Really, Crowley dear there was no need for you to go to all this fuss” Aziraphale said, as the two of them were led inside to their table, one by the window overlooking the Thames

“It wasn’t that much trouble, Angel” Crowley defended, the Maître D’ pouring the water as they spoke

“Just to get on the waiting list for this place takes months”

“Should I be concerned or insulted by the fact that you think I would go on a waiting list?” Crowley asked trying to maintain a straight face

“A little of both, sorry” Aziraphale answered with a small smile

“Your menus, sirs, will there be anything else?” the waiter, Michael asked them.

“No, thank you” Aziraphale said, Crowley nodded in agreement.

“Very well, just let me know when you are ready to order” Michael said, before going to check the next table.

“Bloo…” Aziraphale began as he opened his menu

“Language, Angel” Crowley reminded him, seemingly unfazed by the price range

“I’m sorry, dear” Aziraphale replied “It’s just some of these prices. Does it really cost fifteen pounds for the crab starter? And the steak, its fifty pounds” he commented, glossing through the pages.

“’Zira, if this is your way of asking what the price limit is for this evening, there isn’t one. And, the steak does look good, I admit, but you’re on your own with the crab”  
“Merely an observation” Aziraphale replied, waving his hand “You know how I get with fish”

“How could I forget, besides I believe I’m ready to order, you?” Crowley asked

“Yes, I believe so. I’ll get the waiter”

*****************

To: kingdomcome@heaven.co.uk  
Subject: Dinner?

  
No not with us, you feathered morons.

Crowley’s taken Aziraphale out to dinner

Your Immortal Enemies  
Hell  
Tuesday 3rd March  
20:34

\---

To: sevencirclesof@hell.com  
Subject: Dinner?

Since when has that been headline news?

Your Ever Forgiving Upstairs Neighbours  
Heaven  
Tuesday 3rd March  
20:42

\--  
To: kingdomcome@heaven.co.uk  
Subject: Dinner?

3 Star Michelin restaurant

Your Immortal Enemies  
Hell  
Tuesday 3rd March  
20:51

\--

To: sevencirclesof@hell.com  
Subject: Dinner?

We take your point

Your Ever Forgiving Upstairs Neighbours  
Heaven  
Tuesday 3rd March  
20:59

*****************

As the evening went on, it became clear that Crowley had more in mind than a simple change of scenery to dinner at the Ritz. The restaurant had begun to quiet down around nine thirty; the pianist though was still in the corner of the room.

“You know, I remember going to Germany to listen to Bach play this piece” Aziraphale commented, as he finished his fillet mignon

“I know, hence why I asked for it to be played this evening” replied Crowley, and if Aziraphale didn’t know better he would have said that the demon looked nervous.  
“Are you alright, dear” Aziraphale asked “Was everything OK, with your dinner?”

“Yes, it was excellent, as it should have been” Crowley assured, having finished his own roast chicken in Parma ham a few minutes beforehand. The bottle of red wine they had ordered was also nearly finished.

“Was everything, OK, gentlemen?” Michael asked, taking their plates from the table

“Marvelous, thank you” Crowley replied “but could we have another bottle of wine, please?”

“Certainly, Sir, will there be anything else?” “Would it be possible to have the dessert menu, as well, please? Aziraphale inquired

“Of course, I’ll be back in just a moment” Michael answered, with a slight bow.

“You know, this is nice, but what’s the occasion?” asked Aziraphale, pouring them the last of the wine

“Well, I suppose there’s no time like the present” Crowley began “I admit, originally I had what I was going to say rehearsed to the point I forgot to insult the plants , but things change. What doesn’t change though is that I love you, you book loving, polite, duck feeding, tea drinking, sweater-vest wearing Angel, so will you marry me?” Crowley asked, taking the small black box from his top pocket.

“Of course, I will” Aziraphale said, opening the box to find a sterling studded silver ring inside.

“I had to guess the size, but it should fit” Crowley said, as Aziraphale took the ring out

“I’m sure it will” Aziraphale replied

“May I?” Crowley asked, holding out his hand

“Certainly” said Aziraphale, passing the ring back to Crowley so that the Demon could place it on his ring finger.

“Perfect” Crowley said

**************

To: sevencirclesof@hell.com  
Subject: The Bet

  
Call it a draw?

  
Your Ever Forgiving Upstairs Neighbours  
Heaven  
Tuesday 3rd March  
22:26

\---  
To: kingdomcome@heaven.co.uk  
Subject: The Bet

Very well.

Now, about the wedding….

Your Immortal Enemies  
Hell  
Tuesday 3rd March  
22:34

\---

To sevencirclesof@hell.com  
Subject: The Bet

We have a few ideas, as we are sure you do as well.

Care to discuss them at the next meeting?

Your Ever Forgiving Upstairs Neighbours

  
Heaven  
Tuesday 3rd March

22:45

\--

To: kingdomcome@heaven.co.uk  
Subject: The Bet

Paperwork is going to be a nightmare, but we’re thinking a summer wedding

Your Immortal Enemies  
Hell  
22:57

**Author's Note:**

> Demon: An angel who fell from Heaven. Or in the case of Crowley ‘sauntered vaguely downwards’  
> Shop: A place from which to buy goods. Aziraphale hasn’t seemed to have grasped this concept, even after thousands of years on Earth, therefore in Aziraphale’s case ‘shop’ is a place for his own private book collection. This is not considered a good business strategy.  
> Both Heaven and Hell had been disappointed to learn that the Arrangement was not referring to marriage. Even if they did argue like an old married couple at times.  
> Aziraphale is certain that Crowley not breaking any motoring laws is a sure sign of another attempt at Armageddon


End file.
